What to do with the Engagement Ring during the wedding ceremony?

It might not be the most difficult part of your wedding to plan, but the question of what to do with the bride’s diamond engagement ring during the ceremony arises frequently. For many an auxiliary question is how the bridal set should be worn after the ceremony? That might influence the placement of the wedding and engagement rings during the wedding itself.

Traditionally engagement and wedding rings are worn together on the left hand, especially if they are a set. The wedding ring is usually first, and closest to the heart, and the engagement ring is worn on top of it. This means that the engagement ring will have to be taken off or changed to the right hand for the ceremony. That way the groom can place the wedding ring in its intended order. After the ceremony the engagement ring can be replaced on the left hand above the wedding ring, if so desired.

Superstition holds that the wedding ring should never be taken off, and if it is not put on first it will have to be removed every time you want to clean or store the engagement ring. Not all women want to wear the engagement ring every day, especially if their job prohibits one, or there is a baby who can be easily scratched.

Of course not removing the ring at all can be very inconvenient, especially if you have the type of skin that becomes irritated under the band after washing your hands. In a blog post on “The Knot”, one woman went even further when she said she takes the whole bridal set off and substitutes a simple gold band at work. She is a nurse, and she does this for safety reasons. Another woman wrote that she was a firefighter and since she intends to remove her engagement and wedding rings only for cleaning or very dirty chores, her fiancé (also a firefighter) designed a set that was capable of withstanding some very damaging situations.

The question of whether the diamond engagement ring should be removed for the ceremony becomes irrelevant if the wedding band is a wide stand-alone ring with or without diamonds. In that case the decision will have already been made that the engagement ring will always be worn on the right hand.

A variation on placement is the engagement ring first and the wedding ring second, the rational being the order that the rings were given and received. The engagement ring would then be left on during the ceremony and the wedding ring placed on the ring finger of the left hand, above the diamond.

The order the rings are worn in, or whether they are ever taken off, is a decision made at the discretion of the couple, and is no indication of how long the marriage will last or how sincere their love is.